Asshole Musicians Of The Week

Celebrities do a lot of dumb things. All the time. I know it, you know it and if they weren’t to busy doing afore-mentioned dumb things, they’d probably know it too. So here’s my top  asshole moves by bands/musicians.

  1. Maroon 5.

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Everyone that knows me knows I support gay marriage, have several gay friends and fully believe in a “live & let live philosophy”.

However, let’s play a game of spot the hypocrisy.

In Russia homosexuality was classified as a mental illness till 1993 and being openly gay was banned till 1999. Anyone that falls under the category of LGBT is openly discriminated against, has no legal protections and zero domestic partner rights. There are multiple documented cases of transpersons being beaten by vigilante groups for using the wrong bathrooms or being openly trans. Want to see freedom for openly gay people? Read up on the Russian punk band Pussy Riot.

Why bring this up? Maroon 5 has decided they can’t perform in NC because the anti-lgbt law there goes against their principles. Yet they still plan to perform in Russia this summer.

I guess principles get all “grey area” where their wallets are concerned.

     2. Beyonce

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Beyonce is all about girl power, woman power, race power….power power, power. We’ll skip over the fact that she completely fucked over the original members of Destiny’s Child and talk about her clothing line Ivy Park. Because, while she’s all about empowering women, she opted to have her clothing line manufactured in Sri Lanka. And while Beyonce is all about empowering women, the seamstresses in her factory make $6.23 a day. Now that’s power(Honorable mention goes to the national review that claims Beyonce is a hero because most workers in Sri Lanka make slightly less than $6 a day).

3. Justin Bieber

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Poor Bieber had to cancel a show in Argentina. During a visit to Argentina in 2013, Bieber was seen disrespecting Argentina’s flag during a concert and in 2015 an Argentinian judge issued an arrest warrant for him related to the assault of a photographer.

Although let’s be honest, he makes this list as long as he’s breathing.

 

 4.Wes Scantlin (Puddle Of Mudd Vocalist)

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The Charming, lovable lead singer of Puddle of Mudd has a warrant out for his arrest after failing to appear in court for one of the 12,000 dumb things he’s done in less than 2 years.

The singer’s arrest record is a laundry list of charges, including trespassing and vandalizing his former home, multiple DWI / DUIs and even riding the baggage carousel drunk at an airport. Scantlin’s also made headlines for multiple mid-show meltdowns where he accused a fan of stealing his house, shutting down a show after verbally abusing the venue’s sound guy and ranted at the crowd from a chair onstage while the rest of his band walked offstage. He even somehow managed to avoid charges for being involved in a standoff with 30 police officers. While attempting to jump-start a car, Scantlin hurried from the driveway and into his house when the authorities arrived, refusing to come out for two hours. Winning!

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Friday Night Math

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So Wendy’s is going to put in self order kiosks at 6,000 locations this year, and if it goes well, start rolling it out to franchises next year. I’m going to guess if this does well, McDonald’s, Burger King and other fast food chains will follow very quickly, like right around the time minimum wage hits $15 in NY, CA and the other states putting it in to effect.
 
So here’s a quick economics lesson:
$15 is more than $9 or $10
but $9 or $10 is a lot more than what you get when your unemployment runs out because you’ve been replaced by robots.
Additionally, $9 or $10 is also enough to afford that GED you didn’t bother with or $9-$10 is enough for most people to scrape by with to get an associate degree at a community college.
lastly, $39,000 a year average for most people with associates degrees is a lot more than $9-$10 an hour. Probably worth you racking up a few years of student loans so you don’t have to smell like fry grease.
My Point?
You did this to yourself.

The Most Important Band In The World…?

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Radiohead is one of those bands.

Yes, they’ve had massive success, even your grandmother probably knows the band exists and maybe even heard “Creep” on Muzak (yes, it happens).

But in reality they’re a band for critics and music geeks. They’re the musical equivalent of Forrest Whittaker.

A few days ago, Radiohead got a cryptic. They erased their FB & Twitter, blanked out their website and sent weird postcards to members of their fan club and people who had recently purchased from their website.

“Something has to be coming!!!!”, the masses screamed.

And today, lo and behold, they pulled a Beyoncé (who has been pulling a Radiohead/Nine inch Nails for her last few releases). Here, ladies & gents, is “Burn The Witch”.

Now I’ll admit I like Radiohead. I don’t love them, but i do see a certain genius in a lot of their work. This, though?

For years Coldplay wanted to be a more mainstream Radiohead. Listen to any song off 2008’s  Viva La Vida and you’ll hear a band desperate to be taken seriously. Of course then they did a duet with Rihanna and went shitty pop. I blame Gwyneth. But I digress….

Listen to “Burn the Witch” again. Then listen to the title track from “Viva La Vida” and try not to laugh. Yes, after 23 years of pushing boundaries and “blowing minds”, Radiohead have put out a single that is essentially a super mopey  retread version of a song released by a band that was trying to sound more like Radiohead 8 years ago. Need a flow Chart? I have a headache.

 

Let’s be honest. Radiohead have been believing their own hype for years. The BendsOK Computer were fantastic, Kid A was claustrophobic and engrossing, Amnesiac was slightly more filler than killer, Hail to the thief was mostly misses, In Rainbows regained some glory, but King Of limbs was really listenable to critics and diehards only. What we have is a band determined to seal their legacy by  becoming a bit more self-indulgent every single album. They might as well become a prog rock band. And not a good one like Yes or Dream Theater. no, they’re becoming The Mars Volta bad (another self-indulgent hype loving crap fest).

Radiohead is one of those bands that people feel important for loving. So I wonder what those people will do now that Radiohead is a step away from releasing The Scientist?

 

The Post where i rant about the Rock-N-Roll Hall Of Fame.

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The Rock-N-Roll hall of Fame ceremony was last night. Don’t worry, the show runners will whittle the ceremony down to the most bland, predictable moments for mass consumption very soon.
Gene Simmons of kiss recently spoke out against NWA getting into the Hall of Fame, saying that  rap is killing rock-n-roll and “I am looking forward to the death of rap,” he stated. He’s actually been bitching about rappers getting in for several years.

But Gene seems to forget that the spirit of rock-n-roll doesn’t die when you let rappers (or Chicago) into the hall of fame. It dies every time every one of these bands (of any type) agrees to be part of a bloated, political, mainstream mess that actually doesn’t give a shit about artists. My problems with the Hall of Shame echo my issues with the Grammys. The people voting and running these organizations are the same vastly out of touch members of the old guard that left blues, doo-wop and Motown artists penniless and destitute later in life, then “honor” them long after they’re mostly dead and profit off their inductions.
Ice cube said in a recent interview “…but I think he’s (Gene) wrong on this, because rock ’n’ roll is not an instrument and it’s not singing. Rock ’n’ roll is a spirit. N.W.A is probably more rock ’n’ roll than a lot of the people that he thinks belong there over hip-hop. We had the same spirit as punk rock, the same as the blues.”
 The flaw in Ice Cube’s statement is that this is an oganization that doesn’t care about the spirit, it lets personal tastes, back room deals and whatever way the (usually minority) public opinion is blowing decide who gets in. The fact is if any of these 20, 30 & 40 year old bands still had any rock essence left in them, most of them would stop touring as a nostalgia act & break up (good move Motley Crue).
 In fact, let’s be completely honest, if the 18 yr old versions of Gene Simmons, Ice Cube, Billy Joe Armstrong, James Hetfield, Iggy Pop, The Beastie Boys, Run DMC, Public Enemy, The Sex Pistols or The Clash, among others, were to see that most of these people actually cared about an induction into this Hall Of Shame, their younger versions would kick their asses. If rock is dead, it isn’t because Chuck D got in, it’s because he allowed it to happen at all.
Lastly:
I don’t really like Steve Millers music, never have. But he gets it pretty right with this statement. Nice to see someone say something.

Wasting the American Dream

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Tonight on Fox there was a reality game show called “Super Human”. Basically a show about people with heightened observational skills. I’ve definitely watched worse, but not by a lot.

Anyway, the last “Superhuman” was a young latino man with a ability to memorize things in ways that esentially give him a photgraphic memory. Now before they show the contest, the do the typical humantarian background bullshit piece. In his he talks about how him mother imigrated to America for a better life for her kids. They grew up dirt poor and he sold random things door to door to help support the family. Nice story, right? ehhhh. Here’s my issue:

When he realized at a young age that he had his ability, did he buckle down in school? did he share his special skill with people that could’ve gotten him free rides to some of the best colleges in the world? Nope. He spends his 20’s being a novelty act, scraping by when he can and of course jumping at the chance to make $20K on a game show. And of course none of that should matter to me since his mother is in the audience crying with joy & once a week he teaches kids at a high school some of his memorization techniques. I call shenanigans.

This kid has squandered his life in the worst way possible. He could have been anything, ANYTHING, and yet he’s chosen to be a birthday party/corporate gig/Reality tv sideshow. His mother should be crying with shame, not joy.

TV Broke Vs. Real Broke

I have very, very basic cable, like 15 channels basic, mainly because cable is expensive and it’s 300 channels of shit. So when i actually watch tv it’s usually whatever syndicated crap is on TBS. Right now it’s Two Broke Girls.

So lets break this down:

  1. they both have full time jobs
  2. They own a cupcake business
  3. In the mind numbing epsisode i just watched they have a thriving tee shirt side business
  4. They have a two bedroom apt in NYC with a back yard big enough to have a small barn & a full size horse.
  5. They can afford to feed the horse.
  6. In the last episode they got a $10,000 business loan and now have $13,650 in savings.

So, by TV standards they’re broke. This means i should be in the next Sally Struthers feed the children commercial.

I wish i was that broke.

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